Patty: Melody Miller thank you so much for being on Her Legacy Podcast. It is an honor and a joy and I just love how our roads continue to cross.
Melody: Yes they do. I don’t know Patty for some odd reason when we first met. Right. Years ago at Kraft Foods.
Melody: For some reason I just kind of figured you know what this might actually be one of those life time relationships.
Patty: I think so. And it started when I will never forget. I was watching OK so here’s to paint a picture of when we both came from corporate. We have the scars to prove it.
Melody: Yes we do.
Patty: Back in our Fortune 50 days and one of the, So Ms. Melody Miller she my stakeholders she was my internal customer. And so it was my first time meeting her. She is head of global tech design technology.
Really really fancy title and the home line I was like OK who’s this Melody. Miller so naturally I went on Linked In and it was scoping you out and trying to figure out your background. And it’s funny because I’ve found that the latter part of my career in corporate the more it let any potential guard down. And I was just being authentic.
The better the relationships I was able to forge and so when I saw the first thing that popped in my head is oh my god you have the best eyebrows ever. Do you remember that?
Melody: I remember that it’s like. Can I just say something? Your eyebrows are like perfect.
Patty: I know. And My boss was like OK that’s an opener and She even recall them with miss in and I am I am who I am and so are you Melody.
Thank you so much for being on the show and I want to get a little braggy like I always start my shows and I want to ask you to get braggy to what is your superpower.
Melody: So my superpower and I was actually just just talking about this with with one of my clients literally 30 minutes ago. Is my confidence. My. And that’s one reason I named my company the confidence trifecta right. That is my superpower.
My confidence. I actually did a poll as you know when I was trying to figure out what the name my company on what my next step was. I sent out a survey to all of my friends and family former colleagues you know former business partners everybody and I said OK if Melody had a superpower what would it be.
I’m telling you ninety nine point nine percent of the responders said hey your competence precedes you into a room. You know you are the most confident person I have ever met. So that’s my superpower.
Patty: I agree. I agree. And it’s really interesting because the genesis of the confidence trifecta. I was there when when we were doing the whole super thing and it was at that retreat. And I just said it was so amazing because it was so natural. And we were talking about how when you ask your tribe you asked your folks because we’re so innate we don’t see the strengths in ourselves.
You do. But I think that really cemented it for you that that was something to really leverage is the confidence trifecta because beyond the things that people do underlying they just want to get permission or receive permission to step into their power and confidence is such a big part of that. And you have that you always have had that.
And this just comes. It comes from a place of joy. Is the way I see you you all have a very joyful spirit about you. And it’s really natural. And it’s really fun and it’s really authentic. So….
Melody: Well Thanks Patty. And speaking authenticity you know that was one reason as you know that I had to emancipate myself from America. I pray that.
Patty: Tell us about the background because I will never forget. There was a holy emancipation year after Melody Miller quit her big corporate job and it was a very very big title very high accolade in the whole line. So take us through that trajectory because here’s the thing.
This conversation is going to not only be about your emancipation but how you have turned your philanthropy your love of giving. It’s giving you a bigger version of yourself that you’re stepping into. I want to get to that point but I want the background so people can see just how we’ve come to this point.
Melody: Yes so. So yeah I I tell people you know I am a recovering corporate executive. I spent almost 30 years in corporate America working for Fortune 50 companies and as you as you alluded to my last position was pretty big. I was the director of design operations for the company that owns Oreo cookies. Trident Gum. Ritz crackers Cadbury chocolate.
I was actually the person responsible for the printing the graphics and the printing and all of their packaging globally worldwide. So that was my last corporate position. But the thing is I’ve found out. Close close to turning 50 that I was not going to be able to survive it. I was not going to be able to retire. In corporate America because literally although I loved my job what I did. I found that I could not be my authentic self. I spent years.
Trying to. Fit that corporate mold talk like them dressed like them you know do my hair like them you know “them”. And I literally was too Melody. I was the corporate Melody. And then I was the at home around my friends when everybody else Melody. And I realized I could live like that but more importantly I realized I didn’t have to live like that. So. I developed a plan and. And I’ve always been frugal with my money. So I developed a plan of emancipation as I as I coined it. So first I had emancipated my daughter. I have a daughter Marisa.
So I knew once I could I emancipated her meaning after her college years then I could exit corporate America. So I put a plan in place. It took me about. Four and a half years to work that plan. And literally. Three months after my daughter graduated from college. I exited corporate America. And. Then decided to be still literally for six months I did nothing. And trying to figure out what’s my next step. But I this is what I do know and is important for your listeners to know this. You. Really have a purpose.
We all have a purpose. And that purpose. The reason we’re here on this earth. It really is tied into who you are. Your story. What brings you joy. And if you really figure that thing out. Then you really can come to a realization of why you’re here. And then you can. Plan a life around that. So so that’s what I did. And yet I founded a lifestyle strategy company which I call the confidence trifecta. Which is mindfulness money management? And manifesting your magnificence. But basically I get up every day. Oh happy to help people. I help people turn their ifs into what is and to Patty’s point. I I’ve always been a giver. And always have felt that if I am of service you know every day. Patty my main objective. Is to be of service.
And. It’s not really to make money. Yeah don’t get me wrong I’m a I’m an entrepreneur. I want to make money. I do. I got bills to pay too. I got a mortgage. I’ve got to eat. But that’s not my main objective. My main objective is to serve. In the capacity that I was put here to do and I know I know for sure that the money is going to find me. I’m a money magnet.
Patty: Right. And the cool thing is I mean we’ve talked back in the day when we were in corporate about how you know how you manifest things you manifested your Jaguar and you’ve always been so physically responsible and just to everything that you do it’s very calculated.
So the one thing that I was not surprised of is when you left corporate you were taking it easy for six months you know enjoying and just being being in the emancipation campaign that you had going.
Melody: Oh yes I remember.
Patty: And then after that you really settled in and thought about. Now you’re an author you’re a coach you’re a philanthropist. You’ve always been a philanthropist.
Tell me what are you excited about because we were talking when the mike was off and I love what you’re doing and it’s just so brilliant how you have married both your career and your philanthropy together.
Melody: Yeah it’s really exciting and I’m so glad they were able to talk about it on so while I’m while I’m out here serving and you know getting clients and helping people live their best lives. Me and some friends. Well namely Nicole Robinson she’s currently the vice president of community involvement for the Chicago Food Depository.
She was on the board of the Chicago Foundation for Women. And they have what they call these circles these giving circles. And Nicole approached me one day and said you know. They they don’t have a circle for the South Side of Chicago. And do you. There are so many grassroots organizations and nonprofits that are affecting the lives of black women and girls. But they need funding. And the foundation does not have of a circle for this outside. What do you think? Not you know what? Let’s do this thing and that’s a good thing. So we started out by having meetings at our different homes and inviting women like minded women like us.
That they wanted to help that affect the lives of black women and girls on the South Side of Chicago. And we were very particular about who we fund. So when we fund nonprofits and grassroots organizations around three main focus issues. Economic security. Freedom from violence and access to health services and information. So as you’ve said I’ve always been a giver. Always. Given. But what’s what’s really exciting and important for me in the south side given circle.
We’ve named ourselves the queen makers. And I can tell you about that too. But what’s exciting about this is that I am hands on. We are hands on with these organizations when we fund these organizations we could see the impact. Of where exactly where our money is going how it’s affecting these black women and girls and that is just so satisfying for me to see exactly how a little bit. Can go a long way. So and that is part of who I am. So to be able to marry that with my career and my coaching. And mentoring. Consulting it’s just it’s just makes me even more of of who I am. Being Melody.
Patty: Yeah that’s so great. Tell us where you’ve married everything and It sounds like there’s opportunities that are coming as a result of this work that you’re doing and the exposure they are getting in the media that you’re getting in so what’s there to happen is that you’re really honoring what motivates you.
Melody: Yeah absolutely. So right. I’m so I’m like LA LA LA LA. I’m part of this or that it is just a great feeling internally and everywhere and everything but to your point it’s like the more PR that we get the more events that we have are the opportunities are just coming out of the woodwork. You know I’m I’m talking to people that want to sign contracts with me or my company. For coaching or mentoring of in their organizations.
I’ve written a book to your point on. Getting back to wonderful. Wisdom and inspiration for the peaks and valleys and Melody M. Miller you can find that on Amazon but from the philanthropy work then you know I have people that are asking me about my book.
They want me to come and do book signings. And so that all came out of the philanthropy part of my work. So yeah it’s been awesome. It’s been a pleasant. Surprise was surprise because that’s how the universe works.
Patty: Right. And then it’s so cool because. Can you say OK so let’s go back to the point of when you first quit your job? Six months. You were just taking it easy. You know catching up on some R and R. Did you feel any fear or worry or was it an easy transition to do.
What kind of hurdles did you get to? Because it’s not like you had the entire plan laid out. So you’re just one step at a time. What was your approach defining where you are right now.
Melody: I did not know I did not have the plan. And that was part of those six months of of of stillness. I just knew I had to exit corporate America that I knew.
The other thing I knew for sure was whatever it was that I had that was going to be my next step. It had to allow me to be my authentic self. First be of service to others. Second and third make a living.
Melody: Right. So that’s what I knew for sure. But other than that. I didn’t know what I was going to be doing. I didn’t know what that would look like as far as they vocation and that was part of that six months of being still and really trying to tap into the universe really getting to know myself. Right.
Who are who I am and more importantly who do I want to be who do I want to be in the second half of my life. So it was those questions that I was seeking answers to in those in those six months and then I looked out for the signs because you’re the person who’s going to give you signs. So.
Patty: Can you tell more and more about the signs so say for example there’s a listener out there that is in the shoes that we were once upon a time like to listen. If I have to hear. One more year of these corporate meetings where I have to do my year in review and get my 2 percent. I would literally went to jump up that window.
Patty: And that person is thinking of leaving. What would you say like I mean we all go through our own version of it? I know for me I thought I had it all together and then I quit I was like well I just do you know me like it was crazy.
Melody: And we do know this is what we know and this is what I want to talk to your listeners about. We were both there. Right.
Melody: I was Terrified. When I first thought about leaving are you kidding? I was terrified. I thought I can’t you even talk to me a few times… Ella by you has the talent to go. You don’t need this place like no I need this place because I let the fear paralyze me. Right. Out. So this is this was the thing. This is what’s important. And I talk about this in my book as well. FEAR is false evidence appearing rear wheel real.
Don’t let the fear stop you. It’s not real. You. You can do it. Listen I’m now convinced I can do anything. The fear was designed to stop us. So what do you do? You take it along with you. You know some people try to wait for the fear to subside. You know I’m going to be able to do this when I’m not so scared. Well guess what. Fears never going to go away. You got to take it with you. You. Literally put it on your backpack.
Patty: Exactly and it’s like that. Anyway.
Melody: You got to do it anyway.
Melody: You got to put the put their own like a backpack. So that’s going to be heavier than others. But keep moving do it anyway. Get your plan. You know as you know I’m a planner so I’m not telling anybody quit your job tomorrow. You don’t stop on the fear. Quit your job tomorrow and just figure it out. No no no. No that’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying.
Take the fear with you. Put a plan in place. Anything is possible because the only thing you have to do. Is keep living I tell people everything is possible. Only thing you have to do is keep living. Put your plan in place and work the plan you. And you know and we’re laughing because it’s so simple.
Patty: It really is.
Melody: It is. But is this the fear that stops people. Yeah. Because the other thing I know for sure I’ve found in my practice Patty. Is that people having difficulties? Difficulty imagining and fantasizing about all the good that’s going to come. From them making this decision to walk to the fear because we are conditioned and designed to only think about the negative and the bad parts. Oh my god I’m not going to feed my child.
Oh my God I’m going to I no going to be independent mortgage. I’m not going to be able to get a car payment because you know you do know is usually about money. I know it was about money with me. And I had money and I was still fearful about leaving corporate America. The people have to understand put the plan in place worked the plan. Anything. Is. Possible. I need you to actually visualize and imagine. All good things though it will come from you doing that thing that you were afraid to do it might not be leaving you’re the job that you hate it might be something else that you’re just really afraid to do.
Figure out what that great thing looks like after you’ve done it. Then make the leap. Don’t think about all of the bad things that could happen because I’ll tell you this Patty in my life term. What I’ve found. Is that life rewards change. That’s that’s why people say depending on who you ask. I’m just the opposite of being risk averse. I might take any risk. Because I convinced myself that life rewards strange and a bigger risk that I’m going to walk through that fear and do. The bigger the reward. The bigger the reward. So I move over that thing.
Patty: Yeah well and then it becomes an adventure. You you’re leaning into it and then so I just have a couple of thoughts that came to mind when we were talking about that. I mean you know one of my mentors for me helped me to understand the reframe is you are where your attention is so if you’re worried about can’t pay my bills, can’t pay my mortgage, can’t pay my this can’t pay my that and that the head games that we play it’s all within our own control.
That’s the thing the inner world we’re always reflect your outer world. So if you have the stress and anxiety and the uncertainty is because that’s what you’re focused on and that’s the simplicity of it. But at the end of the day it’s so complicated because we humans make it complicated. And what you’re saying is just trust that things unfold the way that they’re supposed to like you. You know first leaving your job and then you’re like OK now what do I want to do for my encore career. Because you had been in the game for 30 years and that’s a long time and so we become ingrained with our habits and the things that we do in the day in the day out but you.
And it’s very scary for those people that are here I me it’s for some people it’s very scary but that’s scary don’t allow it to extend to a year in two years and keep your frozen and miserable. It’s like feel let walk through it. I almost envision like a wall of fire just walk through it and then literally things will unfold and you’ll look back and be like I was just my comfort zone that was trying to extend right because we are within our boxes and that’s what happens.
Melody: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I tell people to and I know a lot of your readers are going to be able to relate to this because oftentimes we wonder why are people willing to stay. In places that are. That is difficult. Why are people willing to stay in spaces that are too small for them?
Why are people willing to continue to do things that they’re not happy with that don’t make them bring them joy. The reason why partially. Is because that’s what they’re familiar with. So hey I’m familiar with this even though it’s causing me stress and I hate it and this could be abusive. But I’m familiar with it’s the idea of going through something unfamiliar and unknown. That takes getting used to.
Melody: So were comfortable to that. Yes. That’s why people are willing as you just said. go Another year another year and then another year because of course OK. Because I’m used to being as I’m used to taking this abuse. At least I know what I’m going to get to put up with. As opposed to. You know what. Let me create. A new reality.
Patty: Yes. Yeah.
Melody: It takes for me-too Move with some actions to my new reality right that I’ve created. So that’s true. And that’s what I helped my clients do. It’s like you got to create the new reality first than most to jump off a cliff into darkness and not know where where you’re going to land. And isn’t that a thrill.
Melody: Sure we. Sure we. And let me let me back up a little bit. We both jumped off a cliff. Right. We did. We we jumped into an abyss. Sure we did. But we but we had an idea of where that soft landing was going to be right.
Melody: Because we created it.
Patty: Right in its trial. It’s trial and error and here’s the other side of it it’s like. I at this point because I’ve gone through the ebbs and flows I left. I worked one day in January of 2013 to get my bonus. Oh it is now. I mean it’s been six years and I Literally.
Melody: I’m so proud of you.
Patty: Thank you. And it’s really interesting because there are times when it’s the ebbs and flows. You know what I mean like things get you know like OK by me. Let me get refocused let me breathe through it. I’m really big on the breath work like just calm myself and ground my energy and just create what I want to create because I just have to create my reality right. So.
Patty: I could never and this has come up more than one occasion where my mom will say to me why don’t you just find a good job. I said Mom I can’t. I literally can’t I mean my core values say it all my primary core value is freedom. I just want to do what I want where I want whenever I want.
How I want. I just could never go back because I know too much now and I’m intellectually know too much less at it is I know too much of what it’s like to live on the other side in freedom that the thought of somebody telling me where are you been I’m like or can I go on vacation are you kidding me. I can’t even comprehend that anymore.
So that’s why I’m not willing to sacrifice my freedom my freedom is my core value and my other my other ones are contribution and prosperity. I know just like you. When I’m of service when I give first and then it just is going to common prosperity is because it’s our birthright. But is not about the money. It’s about the prosperity that’s our birthright that we all deserve.
Patty: Because God didn’t put us on here to struggle.
Melody: That’s exactly right. And that prosperity for all of us that you talk about it’s already ours.
Patty: Yes. Yes.
Melody: You just have to claim it.
Patty: We just negated what we are with our head garbage.
Melody: Absolutely. OK let’s face it Patty condition. C’mon where condition to go to School get a degree and get a good job and work until 65. Oh and by the way put off though.
Put off your your joy your happiness your freedom OK because freedom is the first First is you go get a week vacation. Day and two weeks. And then eventually after so many years maybe you might get 4 weeks of vacation. You’re only supposed to really live during the week the vacation for the people that actually take one.
Melody: C’mon Now. That’s how we live and how long it took us to figure it out.
Melody: Make it better anniversaries. I’m coming up on my 3rd for my 3 year anniversary.
Melody: on the 26th of this month is my 3 year anniversary of emancipation.
Melody: And like you I will never go back.
Patty: I can’t.
Melody: You know what I tell people first of all I have a job because I’ve been told the same thing. You know few of my low points I’ve been asked you taken my big cup you look for a job you know what my response that has always been I have a job. How dare you. I have a job.
Melody: Home asks me if I need to make some adjustments or come up with some new streams of income. But don’t dare ever say to me I need to go look for a job. I have a job.
Patty: Yeah. Yeah. It’s my Purpose.
Melody: Yes. Purpose because they have that mentality right.
Melody: I’ll tell people I’ve got too much stuff I could sail. For I go back to corporate America.
Melody: You know my lifestyle.
Melody: I got way too step back and I can sail.
Melody: That will get me over any kind of rough financial patch which I’m not expecting. Who knows? Girl I’ve sell this stuff so quick. That’s what it is. Stuff…
Patty: You’re so funny, well here’s the thing. And it is very true. It’s just a different mindset and I’m literally two years ago .because it is it’s like you realize how much you don’t need because my peace and my happiness. Is worth more than anything else. Trust me I like to believe a ton’s Chill.
I want a Prada purse. Let me see I’ve seen your shoes. Right because you diploma you’re given a lot for peace of mind and happiness and the simplicity of it it’s like to me the joy that I get to work with the clients that I get to work with because they’re making their impact their leaving their legacy that is so soul fulfilling to me.
Fulfilling that I’m not willing to trade that for anything. So we’re both on the same page as we’re talking about how our contribution and the significance that we that we get out of it not from our own accolades but just how meaningful the work is.
Patty: That’s something that brings you joy. That’s the happiness that’s the peace. And when you talk to the money like you you’re going to create them only because you know you can’t. And you have such a strong mindset about manifesting whatever you want.
Melody: Yes. And would talk and talk about manifesting it. And that was something else. We talked I talked about what my client earlier today. The moment that I realized and this was this was years ago years ago when I knew manifesting works. The moment.
That I realized. Deep down into the marrow my bones. And in the very deep part of my being. When I realized. That I can have. Anything I want… Literally. People you listen to a woman that feels like she can have. Anything she wants. Anything. Right.
Melody: Guess what. All of a sudden I don’t want so damn much.
Patty: Exactly that’s my point you really realize how much you really do. Oh my god that’s so key.
Melody: Yep it’s like hell I bucking’ have anything. Well guess what. I don’t even want that much. Because that’s back when we talked about a prosperity mentality right.
Melody: So that’s part of that’s part of prosperity thinking that you already know everything that you ever want are yours. So then you really don’t want. Much a problem mentality says that. None of what I ever want is going to be mine. So now I’m going to script and scraping. No barely pay a bill but I going to buy Louis. Because of that. Look you know because of that projection of who I want to be. Yeah probably right profiling right.
Because that that’s probably mentality says just the opposite. I’m never going to have. What I Want. So. In that case I’m a spend every dime you know getting these things that I think I want. Right. So in essence quickly and I know we kind our diagraph. A prosperity Mindset is just the opposite. You just imagine imagine think through that thing that you actually are already have any and everything. You ever wanted or have access to get it. So then think about then what is it that you really want that all of. That will make your Joy persist because you know what. That’s my life purpose. Yeah your life persists.
Patty: I love that and it’s so true and it’s just really. This is really fascinating because the more I can remember I saw this video on YouTube and if I remember I’ll post it on the show note but it was about these two speakers were in front of a big crowd and they’re like OK what humans want. And they’re like oh they want big car but why, oh I want to live a town because why are I wanted this. I want to travel. Why. The root.
Of why you want to do that is because you want to be happy. So what will it look like if at the core of what you do as a career as your calling is being in service and bringing yourself to all the happiness that you want? You realize how all that other shit that you felt you needed is was going to make you happy.
That doesn’t make you happy that maybe gives you that that serotonin hit because you bought that bad ass pair of shoes or something like that and that was cool. But it does. It’s not a joy that persists like you’re talking about. And the joy that persist is best is because of what you’re doing right now in your career. And then you realize that everything else that’s in the external doesn’t even matter because you already have all the joy.
Melody: That’s right.
Patty: Isn’t that right.
Melody: That’s right. Patty you articulated. It’s so WOW
Patty: Yeah I like this because I’ve come to that realization I’ve been hearing other people and it’s just like why do you want that well because I want Well why do you want that car because it’s cool. But why do you want it. I don’t know because I look good well why so to make me happy. That’s why. Right. That’s how.
I’ve been really really just exploring the the deeper meanings behind why people do what they do. And at the core whether you are living in Kuwait Sri Lanka you know Oklahoma whether it’s like we just all want to be happy.
Melody: We all just want to be happy.
Patty: So it’s her job. So I love the happiness and the the joy that persists in your life with these with your service and the contribution that you are focused on. So tell me what is your definition of success. You’ve kind of answered it as we’re wrapping up.
Melody: OK. My definition of success. Is. To. Be able to live. Each day. In service to others. And. ensuring that my joy persists.
Patty: I love that. It’s as simple as that.
Melody: Simple as that.
Patty: I love it. OK. And then the last question after all is said and done. What do you want your legacy to be?
Melody: I’d like my legacy to be one where. I left. I left a trail. Of I left a trail of. Accomplishment. I’d like my legacy to be that I left a trail of accomplishment. That allow. Others. To. Live their best lives. That’s my legacy to be.
Patty: That’s Beautiful and they have that with Melody Miller So Melody how people get a hold of you. All of that’s given assurance but tell people how they can get in touch with you.
Melody: So you can get in touch with me via my Web site which is. melodymmiller.com. Literally my name a melodymmiller.com My Web site and you’ll see when you go on the site that you can contact me and all different types of ways you can click on the link to send me an email you can click on a link to actually schedule some time with me.
So that’s the best way to contact me but I’m also on social media. I am positively Melody on Instagram. Wonder why.
Melody: Now I’m on Instagram I’m positively Melody on Facebook. I have a group. Your. Virtual life coach.
Patty: So your virtual life coach melodymmiller.com People can. It will also connect your book which is called getting back to wonderful wisdom and inspiration for the peaks and valleys which is available on paperback in Kindle. All that information on how to get a hold of melody will be included in the show notes for this episode.
Thank you Melody for being on the show. As always I absolutely adore you. It is such fun to always catch up with you and hear what’s cooking. So thank you for being on her legacy podcast.
Melody: Thank you Patty.
Here’s the link were you can get hold of Ms. Melody Miller:
Melody M. Miller (firstname.lastname@example.org),
Book signing & Vision Board Workshop 3/2/2019 – N.C.,
Social Media Handles: Melody M. Miller, CPCC
Author, Life Strategist, Speaker
CEO | The Confidence Trifecta, LLC
Instagram: positivelymelody – https://www.instagram.com/positivelymelody/
Facebook: Your Virtual Life Coach – https://www.facebook.com/groups/1955325278127566/
“Getting Back to Wonderful, Wisdom and Inspiration For the Peaks and Valleys” – available on Amazon,
Connect with Patty Dominguez