Before I turn this into a rant… let me preface by saying that I am an “open networker” on Social Media.  I’m open to connecting with people especially because I am online and this is how I make a living.   I always am open, because you never know who you are going to meet next virtually – I actually think it’s quite fun.

However, and that’s a big HOWEVER, I’ve unfortunately had to block violators on Social Media channels.  Sure you get the random creepy guy every now and then who always seems to start his inbox message with “Hello miss…”  That’s an easy fix, just click the Block / Delete button and move about your day… I’m not talking about that guy… I’m talking about this insidious “friend” who out of nowhere violates the “rules”.

I was discussing this the other day with some friends about how there are just some people who don’t understand these unwritten rules of the Social Media road… and while this is a short blog post, I believe it’s a good way to get the conversation started.

Social Media is for creating relationships not for you to SPAM me!  I really think I’m going to create a survey to those misfits / violators asking them if any of the following tactics have netted them any growth in their business (whatever the business it may be – albeit referencing legal businesses in this scenario).


You are a Social Media Misfit if …:  (these examples from Facebook interactions)

  • …If your Profile pic is that of your cat, or a Cowboy boots or similar nothingness… what?? How are you supposed to build a rapport with people?   Get a proper profile pic – you don’t need professional head shots, just a picture of you so we know who you are… for the Love of it all, this is an easy one people.
  • … If you friend me, I accept, then you ADD me to your random Group.  Listen, I’m really not interested in joining your “Ground Floor” opportunity.   You haven’t asked me Permission… I call your attention to the 1999 classic Book from Seth Godin, Permission Marketing — even though this book is somewhat dated, the fundamentals are still so relevant today as it applies to social graces on Social Media.
  • …If  you’ve scoured my Friends list and then inboxing them with your unsolicited offers.  This is completely uncalled for…  Here’s the deal, yes you can create a relationship with someone in my friend’s list, but you have to ease into it.  Do you have something in common?  Do you have several mutual friends?  Do you have similar interests?  Start the conversation online (not in messaging) and see where it organically goes.
  • … If you post your unsolicited RANTS on my wall… what is wrong with you?   Seriously, that’s like spray painting graffiti on my door.
  • … If you tag me in your posts, for your Friday night Zumba black light party… maybe I don’t want to do Zumba?  I get it – you are attempting to leverage my network, but again refer to Seth Godin’s book above.

Of course there are filters and settings that will offset some of this misconduct in Facebook, but every now and then, the misfits will find a way to work around the rules.

Seth! Help us out here, write an updated edition to your book.  If you do, I’d be happy to be a contributing party…

Here’s to the Social Misfits… thank for showing us what NOT to do…

What’s your biggest Social Media Misfit pet peeve?   

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  1. Gerry Downey

    Hey Patty Gerry here first time visitor here I arrived via twitter, interesting post and that exact book is sitting on my drive waiting for my lazy self to dive into it. I had heard about it before, and watched a few Ted Talks on the subject but have yet to read the book it’s on the to do list. Always good to connect with like minded people have a great day.

    • Patty

      Gerry – tell me what you think… yes it’s a classic, but again conceptually – the rules definitely apply… thanks for the comment, I appreciate you!


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